When pride comes, then comes shame;
But with the humble is wisdom.
Proverbs 11:2 (NKJV).
There is a more traditional understanding of the word "humility", one which contains an element of self-deprecation, but it is balanced by truth. What I mean by this is that "humility" is about know who you really are in the grand scheme of things, not merely "thinking more of others".
I say this in that, because so many people think so highly of themselves, they trend towards outright narcissism, their solipsism eventually convincing them of their own deity, and so from such a height as that, falling entails a lot of self-deprecation. A lot of throwing away lies and deceit, both to oneself and to others.
After that process though, what next? When you've finished stripping away the falsehoods, what are you left with?
Hopefully there is "something", and that "something" is part of your humility.
Pride, as connoted in this passage, has more to do with hubris and unfounded arrogance than in simple confidence. When you know that you can perform a task, and you claim that you can perform such a task, to those who cannot or who feel threatened by the fact they cannot, it will appear like bragging.
Think of it this way. If all your life you've struggled with a particular issue, and you find out someone has an easy fix, but you don't understand it, are you quicker to try and do the work to understand, or seek a way to dismiss the apparent solution as a means of preserving your own ego?
The thought, "well it may have worked for them, but it won't work for me" is indicative of this pattern of thinking. The claim that "my circumstances are different", even if by all measures they are not.
That is why pride leads to shame, because at some point or another, someone is going to call you out on that bluff, that deceit. As much as we think of someone making a boast that they can do something is sourced in pride, so is the opposite, in people claiming that they cannot do something, and then giving a non-sequitur reason as to why. They're saving face.
Pride brings shame because it, in this context, deludes us into thinking we can or can't do something that, if we could swallow our pride and be honest with ourselves and others, would be completely possible. We want there to be any reason which cannot be pinned squarely on us.
Conversely, those who have humility, an understanding of just who they are and the truth of their circumstances, they also have wisdom, because wisdom is not contained inside of a person, but given to us by God, the designer of the processes that wisdom applies to. God is literally overjoyed when people stop trying to do things their way and instead pay heed to God's desires regarding their behavior in this life.
The humble are not incompetent, they are not dirt, they are "the greatest of sinners", aware of their own faults and shortcomings, but also aware of the gifts and strengths that God has bestowed upon them, and so because they have embraced truth, they will also learn how best to apply those traits in a way which glorifies and pleases God, which in turn brings them blessing both in this life and the next.
Clearly, this is not to say that the humble are never found doing shameful things, but that they already know what is happening and why, and how to repent of their behavior and, yet again, try to make permanent changes for their own betterment in their ability to reflect God's attributes.
Our pride trips us up, exposes us for what we are when we least desire such honesty. Humility teaches us to make peace with our faults and flaws, and when we need to rely on God, such that we are never completely defined by our mistakes.
Pride restricts who you are to what you can do.
Humility opens up who you are to what you have done and what you could do.
Is the shame worth the empty boasting?
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