24.8.18

Radio Silence Is Intentional

A little while ago, my Twitter account got suspended. I don't know exactly why, because what first happened is that they restricted my account and wanted my phone number to "verify ownership" or something worded similar to that.

From what I'd seen from others who had run afoul of the Twitter rules, what would've happened is that I put in my number, they tell me what to do to get my account back, and then I am given a stern warning to play nice with others.

I didn't think it was worth it.

There are a handful of folks I'll miss, but since our interactions were always filtered through the internet, I can't ever know how seriously they took them, unless I asked them to their face without any sort of audience listening.

And if I could do that, what would I need the social media account for anyway?

I stopped posting on this account because of time constraints. I changed assignments at work, now have more on my plate, and so my desire to spend free time with mostly strangers when the signal-to-noise ratio is as bad as it already is evaporated. This was for my benefit, and if my needs change, something which draws from me and returns not enough is going to be cut for a time.

That silence isn't ending now, I've still a lot to take care of, and I am slow.

Methodical would be a less pejorative way of putting it, but either way I am not quick to commit to action and carrying it out. A combination of laziness and cowardice certainly taints the process, and I can pretend that I am just trying to evaluate choices, that the "decision paralysis" is something that may even carry a positive connotation if I can spin it just right.

But I am simply choosing to fill time with things that are more enjoyable in the moment instead of genuinely beneficial to me in the long run. Things are still getting done, the ones that are important around the house and in relationships and whatnot, but I am not pushing myself correctly to do more than that on a regular basis.

And more will be required as time goes on.

So right now I am somewhat "stuck" in a place of my own design and my own fault and it's my responsibility to get out of it. I could try to blame the choices of others, but that would be pointless. I need to apply what I've learned and take action, sooner than later.

It's easy to write down that which is hard to accomplish, but if the only obstacle is "me", then I don't have any excuses for not making better choices in my free time.

Like rebuilding my 700R4. Finishing the wood furniture. Spraying for bugs and spiders.

There's work to be done, and I have no excuse for not doing it!

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